What it means to B.Known...: April 2009

Let me first say I know women in general complicate things that aren't that difficult...I for one am a realist with my expectations.... enjoy

You remember when you were in like Jr High School and you send that girl/boy a note in your class that said;" do you like me? circle yes or no?". I miss the simplicity of having a crush. It never was too complicated, you either had the feelings reciprocated or you didn't and moved on to the next cute boy/girl in your class. There was no sex nothing like that to confuse a passing admiration with infatuation.

Wikipedia defines infatuation as:
Infatuation is a common emotion characterized by unrealistic expectations of blissful passion without positive relationship growth or development. Infatuation is distinguished by a lack of trust, loyalty, commitment, and reciprocity. In the case of infatuation, there is more often than not an obsessor and an object of desire (generally unattainable). One may come to the conclusion that, unlike love, infatuation is not usually mutual.

Websters defines infatuation as:

Main Entry:
2in·fat·u·ate Listen to the pronunciation of 2infatuate
Pronunciation:
\-ˌwāt, -ˌāt\
Function:
transitive verb
Inflected Form(s):
in·fat·u·at·ed; in·fat·u·at·ing
Etymology:
Latin infatuatus, past participle of infatuare, from in- + fatuus fatuous
Date:
1533
1 : to cause to be foolish : deprive of sound judgment 2 : to inspire with a foolish or extravagant love or admiration
— in·fat·u·a·tion Listen to the pronunciation of infatuation \-ˌfa-chə-ˈwā-shən, -chü-ˈā-\ noun

Defined it would be believed that a passing admiration and infatuation are the same thing, but to me they are completely different. See I have made a conscious effort over the past 5 years to not be in a relationship. They take too much time and emotion and too many feelings get involved.

Passing Admiration: You are attracted to an individual you share the same views or can discuss differences and you talk every once and a while like Jay-Z said "our time together is our time together and our time apart is our time apart, so love Jay with your mind girl and not your heart." Your heart is NEVER involved at least not on my end it's not. When you are away from the person you don't think abt calling them everyday, they aren't always on your mind and when you see each other it's cool, but when your apart it's business as usual.

Infatuation: You(at least one of you) sparks an instant attraction. You talk all the time always want to know/learn more about the person. You rarely question intent and your guard is down. This is something that I avoid at ALL costs because in the end infatuation is an unhealthy mis-direction of feelings. Feelings that can be focused in more productive places like blogging; creating ideas, working out LOL. IDK bottom line being in a situation that is 80/20 sucks. So I try my best not to get caught up. And in some way, shape or for one person is not completely attainable and there are barriers in the way of: lack of mutual feelings, persons involvement with someone else, distance, work...I can go on, but won't.

Then there's love which I have no comment on right now because I'll save that blog for when I feel like I'm in love...can we celebrate on that day??? LOL

Thoughts....